Punk’d!
This is a picture of my scardy cat son driving a kid sized gater around my friend’s yard. Accompanied by a little girl that he had met only when he plopped herself down next time for a ride. I was so proud. Progress. We are making progress on SOME of his fears. By the end of the afternoon, he was actually chasing our friend’s dog around the yard rather than the other way around for the first time ever. I was so proud. It was a big moment for us.
ANYWAY!
The Husband…he is somewhat neurotic about his teeth.
I found this out before we were married, when out of no where he was suddenly convinced his teeth were in danger of falling out AT ANY SECOND. I don’t remember what exactly it was that convinced him of this, but I do remember the numerous late nights that he spent researching teeth falling out and looking at crazy sketchy discount dental plans so that he could go to the dentist and find out for sure that his front teeth had a week to live.
He went to the dentist. He was fine. Not even a cavity in sight.
And thus, he didn’t go to the dentist again FOR YEARS.
He has always grinded his teeth at night. But a couple years ago the stress of his job & life in general started to make it a bigger issue. He was experiencing some jaw pain. He self diagnosed himself with some terrible disease that was going to cause him to die within weeks. And all that jaw pain was making him cranky. So finally he went to the dentist again.
Turns out he just needed an uber sexy mouth guard to solve the problem. Life with the husband’s teeth was happy again. Although I should have bought stock in a company that makes floss, as he really ramped up his flossing routine around this time.
And then YEARS went by again.
And then, on Sunday night, he comes into bed totally freaked out. He noticed that he had some discoloration on his front tooth. I, being the supportive wife that I am, told him that Three probably delivered that tooth a leathal hit with his head, and it was all over for that tooth. The Husband didn’t think it was THAT bad, but he was convinced he was going to need veneers on all of his teeth because of this one spot. Or maybe an implant. Or maybe something even worse. Luckily he had ALL NIGHT to stress over what it could possibly be. Thank god for that mouth guard.
He ends up with a last minute appointment with our dentist late yesterday afternoon, which was the best news I had heard all day because waiting a week would not have been good for my stress level having to listen to him stress about the 1,000,000 things that could possibly be wrong with his tooth.
He goes to the appointment. He comes out. He tells me he has bad news (and for a brief moment that scene from Modern Family where Jay finds out that he needs surgery after hearing from Gloria for the last few days that he was fine, and Gloria freaks out runs through my head). He needs some fillings replaced and he has one cavity. Oh, and those god awful, OMG I AM GOING TO LOOSE MY TOOTH marks?
Turns out drinking 8 cups of coffee a day can leave a stain.
IF he’s worried about his teeth, he should see his kidney and liver for drinking that much coffee! YIKES!
James had a mouth guard for the stress grinding. He managed to grind right through it. Since he was worried he would choke to death one night because he bit off a piece of the guard (which, I’m totally sure could happen *eye roll*), he will not replace that one. Men.